Enclownter: a pair of orb-dispensing robot clowns
Tag: merchants
Encounter: item shop owner from the Outer Planes that got tired of constant Star-Devouring Squid attacks and figuring out exchange rates for souls and individual memories, so they’ve set up a nice little shop on the Prime Material Plane. Loves to chat with customers about how rough life was back on the Blasted Heath of Ktraaaanghzk, and loves Prime Material snacks.
The Quack Frog. Arthur Rackham illustration for a 1912 edition of AESOP’S FABLES.
Encounter: Professor Theophrastus Jehosephat Froggenheimer, sketchy travelling potions dealer; before consuming his wares roll d12
- 1-6: actually what it’s supposed to be
- 7-10: alcohol and food coloring
- 11: random potion other than what it was supposed to be
- 12: some poison or other
Encounter: Mask Merchant (inventory of wares)
Painting of the legend of the Baker of Eeklo, late 1500s, by Cornelis van Dalem (I also have seen mentions of Jan van Wechelen?). Collection of Muiderslot Castle on the Zuider Zee in the Netherlands.
“Legend has it that people with heads they did not like went to Eeklo (Flanders), where the village bakery would rebake their heads in its ‘great and glowing oven.’ Once a doctor had established what was wrong, the baker’s assistant would chop the head off, putting a cabbage on the neck to stanch the flow of blood. The head was then kneaded, sprinkled with flour, and rubbed with wondercream [sometimes egg yolk], before being purified by the heat of the oven and replaced.” [from British Medical Journal 2003 March 29; 326(7391): 692.]
Thus children were admonished not to complain about their looks.
Encounter: the Head-Baker of Eeklo
Encounter: horrible 90s mutant cyberpunk items merchant (source: Tongue of the Fatman)
Encounter: Final Lotion Boss
Roll d8. 1-4: free random orb. 5-8: stabbed with a dagger.
Encounter: Horseshoe Harrigan, traveling merchant of good luck charms and amateur WC Fields impersonator
Random Item Drop 