Homebrew loot, weapons, armor, and snacks for your tabletop gaming and DM/GM needs
military victims vase
ME LMAO
andy’s mom doing his soldiers dirty after he leaves for college
This is so fucking funny like you see this cool, tacky golden weave bowl & look closer to see that it’s a mass of writhing bodies of fallen soilders twisted into another in agony like something out of full metal alchemist
Item: fruit bowl made of the writhing bodies of fallen soldiers twisted into one another in agony and spray-painted gold
Item: Shrimp Head Claws; enable the wearer to both taste and nibble anything within reach. While they do not receive nutrients from the nibbling, they do receive any magical benefits from eating whatever it is (positive or negative). Wearer takes a severe charisma penalty but can get Advantage on Intimidation by threatening to touch people’s faces.
Item: can of German party soup
Item: limited-edition tomato
Item: Teeth-Garage (?)
Item: Barrel-Armor; absorbs Bludgeoning attacks up to 10, but anything above that, roll save against the barrel cracking. If it cracks, roll save again against piercing damage from the shards; if it didn’t crack, roll save against getting knocked down and rolling away. Also, -7 Dexterity.
Item: a Dogmobile, provided front-wheel drive by means of 2 dogs running inside a cage in the front wheel
Of course, you don’t have to use dogs.
Item: boots that fold down to reveal secret soft-leather idols on the inner surface
Item: button that, when pressed, decapitates the user. Use illusion magic to hide it among a villain’s fiendish devices, or hide it in your bra to prevent unwanted gropings. (DMs: please don’t hide it under a floorboard unexpectedly, that’s some “Tomb of Horrors” BS right there, your players just want to have fun)
From my Drafts. Dirty, dirty Opabinia.
Encounter: inappropriately sexual Opabinia
Random Item Drop 